torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
I'm going through a rough patch. I know that, but that doesn't make it any less rough.

Taking some weight off )
torquill: Art-deco cougar face (Default)
I'm going to start keeping a diary here, to help document my health for people who want to know (personally or professionally) what my daily life is like. The subject line will always be "Daily log", and I'll cut-tag all entries.
torquill: Art-deco cougar face (Default)
I haven't posted for quite some time, mostly because I'm not really sure where to start.

The abbreviated rundown )
torquill: Art-deco cougar face (Default)
I decided that I was going to get on the bike today if at all possible.

Adventures and gaming )
torquill: Sarah Jane Smith walking away from the TARDIS, forlorn (Sarah Jane)
This is probably going to get reposted to Tumblr, because it's personal-political.

A Chronic Fatigue/ME rally as a watershed moment )
torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
Okay, a general health update.

Mostly good )
torquill: Tea cures all ills (tea)
How is it that simply calling the Social Security Administration to make an appointment is enough to make me feel like crap?

Don't answer that. I know the reason... I still haven't expunged the creeping feeling that by applying for permanent disability I'm giving up and admitting failure. It doesn't matter that asking me to work a 40-hour week is equivalent to asking a paraplegic to dance a waltz -- the conditioning I've had my whole life, around work ethics and capabilities and what makes a person worthwhile, is all acting like a horrible swamp full of trash that sucks at my self esteem.

I deserve to be able to live without trading my health for money. The fact that I'm reliant on others is not through any fault of mine, and I shouldn't be ashamed of it. Most people don't have a full-time job of just keeping their bodies going.

I'll keep saying these things to myself, and maybe I won't be a complete wreck by the time my appointment comes around. If I am, well, my therapy appointment is that afternoon. We'll see on August 2.
torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
health update )
torquill: Tea cures all ills (tea)
Tomorrow marks four weeks since my shot, and I'm still in the thick of it.

Fun with hormone dysregulation )
torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
On a related note, I have a few thoughts on how all my health stuff seems to tie together.

Tracing things through the black box that is cytochrome P450 )
torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
I think I'm on the other side of my recent health downturn.

Details )
torquill: The devourer of worlds is not impressed. (devourer)
I'm living in the wrong era, clearly.

We know just enough about the health issues I have to know that we don't know enough. At least the providers I see don't think I'm delusional, but they don't even have any way to quantify what's wrong, let alone solve it.

Groping in the dark )
torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
Physiological shock definitely qualifies as an altered state of mind.

Funky, man )
torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
I'm going to be applying for SSI in pretty short order.

Elucidation )
torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
Status quo )
torquill: Doctor Wilson, thoughtful (wilson)
Pluses and minuses )

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torquill: Art-deco cougar face (Default)
Torquill

June 2017

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